Monday 27 July 2009

16.28

i've known you for quite a while now
only now am i getting to really know you
we're slowly becoming real good friends
great company at events like this
now i've got this little crush
that reminds me of high school
hoping, wishing it could turn into a bit more
xKx

Sunday 26 July 2009

16.41

i hope it's not really obvious
in the way i could talk to you
and tell your own stories to others
or in the way i try to spend time with you
make excuses just to hang around longer
hopefully not in the way my face lights up
whenever someone says your name
or in the way i discretely stare at you
smiling, thinking of how cute you can be
secretly i want so badly to tell you
but i know i'll never find the courage to
so i'll keep this little crush to myself
fingers crossed, that you'd be feeling the same way too
xKx

Saturday 25 July 2009

02.06

i've got this little secret i don't really wanna tell
i'm quite happy just keeping it to myself
it's unlike me to not be sharing something like this
i guess i'm scared of what it meant to say it out loud
to have it out in the open would make it seem more real
not sure whether my heart is ready to fall or trust again
but it can't be stopped if i'm already falling for you
xKx

Thursday 23 July 2009

09.40

i really should be getting some rest
i shouldn't be going to work
but i can't help it, i need to
it's the only way i could avoid 'you'
the thoughts of 'you' that fill my mind
and won't put my heart to ease
xKx

Tuesday 21 July 2009

13.53

i really miss you
if only you knew
but maybe you do
i'd give you a clue
can't wait to see you
xKx

Sunday 19 July 2009

08.47

i may be going crazy
feeling all wierd inside
one moment you'll find me laughing
the next my tears can't be stopped

really confused on what i should feel
optimistic now then hopeless the next
life is meant to be really simple
so why do i seem to complicate things

completely unsure, i blame myself
i shouldn't really, but what can i do
maybe sleep would be the best thing for now
as for tomorrow, that's another day, we'll see
xKx

Saturday 18 July 2009

17.03

i close my eyes and i'm in a dream
i'm in my make-believe world i run away to
i like to pretend i'm someone else
and that i'm living a different life
for a moment, i'd forget all my worries
i'd be perfectly happy before returning to reality
xKx

Friday 17 July 2009

17.51

lost in a daydream
i look at his face
he's as lost as i am
can't help but smile
hoping he'd look my way
until then, i'm content just staring at him
his eyes, his smile, his laugh
secretly, slowly, falling for him
xKx

Thursday 16 July 2009

15.45

sometimes i wish i was younger
everything was very much simpler than it is now
carefree, young and life was easy
whenever i get a new toy, i was happy

sometimes i wish i was still in highschool
understanding much less than i do now
new experiences with friendship, shool and love
creating memories to remember forever

now i'm older and more mature
no longer a teenager in high school
or a little kid with a brand new toy
but a young adult all grown up

i hope i'm ready, i hope i'll be okay
can i do this alone? well, i got to try
i'm not perfect and i'm not trying to be
in fact, i'm still learning with each experience

no one ever said growing up was gonna be easy
but that never stopped us from having fun
one thing i know for sure, is that whatever happens in the future
i've got great friends with me to enjoy this ride
xKx

Wednesday 15 July 2009

17.35

what's happening to me
i seem to be losing it
something's gotta be wrong
i'm not myself anymore
i'm reckless and yet very careful
i'm in a hurry and yet there's still time
but then i've been wasting too much time
now i'm chasing something that's too fast
and has left me very very far behind
xKx

Tuesday 14 July 2009

15.46

i miss being just myself
living without a care in the world
there'd be no responsibilities, no worries
and no role that i have to live up to

i want to just be me in a shirt and my old jeans
and i'd match it with my blue sneakers
there'd be no dressing up or make up
no high heels that are painful to walk in

i would scream as loud as i can
run as fast and as far as my feet will take me
i could end up somewhere no one knows my name
and that'd be fine as long as i can be me
xKx

Monday 13 July 2009

15.29

as i sit drinking my hot chocolate
as i have been doing every morning before work
i find myself always thinking, reflecting
how things were and are and what i'd like to change

i am happy, that much i can say
life is simple, not filled with too much complications
everyday is almost always the same, like a routine
and for right now, i'm actually okay with that

i'd admit i might be scared for things to change
i'm not sure whether my heart and i are ready for that
for now, i'll simply take each day one step at a time
soon enough, i might find myself on another rollercoaster ride
xKx

Sunday 12 July 2009

15.26

my heart says this but my mind thinks that
confused as can be, unsure which to follow
it's been said, "mind over matter"
maybe that's why my mind took control

my heart's choosing to be careful
afraid to get hurt and cry again
it's never easy to forget, move on or simply get over it
and my mind knows better than to fall this time
xKx

Saturday 11 July 2009

02.03

my heart's sad when i miss you
when i don't get to see you
when we don't get to talk
but i can't help but smile
everytime they mention your name
my heart starts beating fast
i seem to get all excited
filled with hope and happiness
and i just can't wait to see you again
xKx

Thursday 9 July 2009

02.27

my heart feels ready
my mind says it's about time
my feet would take the next step
my hand to intertwine with yours
my eyes sparkle as i look at you
my ears listen to you sing me to sleep
my smile will show as i lay in your arms
and as you lay your head on mine,
only sweet dreams come til morning
good night my love
xKx

Tuesday 7 July 2009

03.10

relaxing today with my family
feeling real lazy on the sofa
i smile as i suddenly think of you
now wondering where you are and what you're doing

i kinda sorta actually miss you
you and your little stories about society
i miss teasing you about them too
you're good company and real gentleman too

i miss you a bit too much, i'm writing about it now
i can't wait till i see you again, as my heart's restless
maybe you'd be at the next event, i'll keep my eyes open
'cause after all, just like you said, "now i've got you"
xKx

Monday 6 July 2009

my beshie, my bestfriend

we don't talk everyday
although we both wish we did
we haven't seen each other for a while
as we're both on different sides of the world

being apart from family or a 'boyfriend' is hard
but being apart from a bestfriend is as bad
actually sometimes it could be worse
i should know, that's how i feel

but then again, so what if we're far apart
our friendship doesn't end 'cause we're not together
truth be told, our friendship only gets stronger
as we both work on keeping the connection

yes, circumstances change as do we
with each day, we grow older, a bit more mature
going through different things and learning
but still somehow exactly know what each other is feeling

we understand each other in a away no one else can
never afraid to show my true self when i'm with you
i miss your hugs eventhough you say i'm hugging myself
and though miles apart, i can always count on you

i miss just hanging out and our inside jokes ;P
then we'll be rocking to kelly clarkson tunes
and there's our never-ending conversations
oh there's no way i can miss anyone more

we both got big dreams we want to fulfill
but life could get crazy and stand in our way
we'd been through interesting 'relationships', drama, ups and downs
but i knew there's one guy who wouldn't break my heart

one day, we could be roomies in a beautiful european city
doing what we always do when we're together
but until then, phone calls and im's do just fine
knowing very well there's someone who'll always be there for me

bottom line is i really miss my beshie
and i love him 'cause he's family to me
remember 'beshies for life!', a promise i'd like to keep
actually more than a promise, it's a lifelong commitment i made. :))
xKx

Saturday 4 July 2009

22.11

i'd pretend like i don't care
act as though i'm really busy
but would you even notice me
would you actually care
you've got your conversations
and i've also got mine
eventhough it's you i really want to talk to
would you ever actually feel the same
xKx

Friday 3 July 2009

22.03

on my mind awhile
it's been troubling me alot
actually scared to find out the truth
and possibly suffer the consequences

i know i tried my very best
but sometimes, to them, simply isn't enough
i cannot fail them, i don't want to
for disappointment will fill their eyes

everyone has faith and believes in me
they give me hope to stay positive
maybe things won't be as bad as i imagine
fingers crossed and everything will turn out fine
xKx

Thursday 2 July 2009

10.03

i can't help but smile
i've got you on my mind
your smile, your laugh, your eyes
a picture i'd like to keep

i can feel you, you're so close to me
in the silence, i can hear your heartbeat
and as your hand brushes mine
i feel some sort of electric shock

now i've got butterflies in my stomach
and suddenly i'm nervous and conscious
trying hard to keep my cool
and not embarrass myself in front of you

but as long as i'm with you
even in comfortable silence
i know i'd be fine
and just can't help but smile
xKx

Wednesday 1 July 2009

09.33

i find it hard to smile
when my heart's not happy
it's filled with too much emotion
that i can't quite understand

i just wanna scream it all out
shout as loud as i can so you can hear
but nothing ever comes out of my mouth
knowing you probably wouldn't really care

i show a strong facade
but my knees are weak
and with one slight touch
i would probably break

i'm not sure how long i can keep this
pretend like it's not really there
because there is only so much
that my little heart can handle
xKx